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Beginning or End - Choose How You See Your Divorce
I believe that divorce is both an end and a beginning, a Yin and Yang, where you go from the darkness to the light. Is a very hard phase of your life to endure but can be one of the best stages of your life as well.
Some marriages maintain a tight relationship and exclude the outside world out of the marriage, so each spouse lives for the other one with no substantial interaction outside this bubble. If you find yourself at the dry end of things, really alone, than you know there is no one to support you, take you out, or cry with you. No more theater or cinemas or bowling, the common things you used to enjoy, do not exist anymore and you feel like the end of the world, technically your world, the way you lived it, is over and done.
My friend, Rod, is typical in his reactions as far as a man would respond to the situation. He had given up on living. He decided to stop living and declared, "I am officially dead." He kept on breathing because as he said, he was a coward that could not take his life. He essentially stopped believing in himself, quit his high paying job and lived on his savings until they ran out. He found menial jobs that could give him enough money to eat, or he just ate at the Salvation Army. He did not keep in touch with his family, children, or anyone else he knew.
This is the life that many men and women choose to live after a divorce, specially the spouse that suffers the most whom is usually the one that did not want to destroy his or her marriage in the first place or the one that ended carrying most of the economic devastation of the situation. The sense of isolation may last a long time, months, years, and in some cases, a lifetime.
But time pass by, we can not stop it and time heals and makes you forget. After a while people tend to find balance in there life and then the can enjoy it. They create new associates; they generate a new community sphere, discover a new job, familiarize yourself to the new life, and move to a unlike city or country. But eventually life starts to take shape again, like a seed that starts growing into a plant and eventually will produce beautiful blossoming flowers.
My buddy Rod moved south and went out with a couple of ladies and began working at a decent job that provides a comfortable life. So he went on a trip, and while visiting his nation of origin, he rediscovered a long-lost flame, they rekindled their relationship, and then got married. Today, he is living a new happy and prosperous life. He succeeded in dealing with very adverse events.
Life is great! You have to pass the obstacles and keep going towards your goals and keep living. Divorce can be overwhelming but life will go on and you will be happier in the long run. The grass always looks better and brighter on the other side of the hill.
If you want more information, you can read more about my experience as an experienced family law lawyer in Austin TX. You should also watch the free Austin divorce video at www.AustinDivorceHelp.com. Learn how a Austin collaborative divorce attorney can help you through the divorce process with dignity.
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